Squeeze Teases

Even back in the '70s, we used to make fun of Charmin's Mr. Whipple and uncontrollable compulsion to squeeze bathroom tissue...

But apparently, the problem was more prevalent in grocery stores back then than previously recognized:

And yet, just when you think you know the rules, along comes...

"Squeeze me." "Don't squeeze me." "Please don't." "Everybody squeeze." Just one more case of American culture sending out confusing mixed messages.